Skip to main contentSkip to main content
You are the owner of this article.
You have permission to edit this article.

Tween 12 and 20

  • 0
dr. robert wallace

Boys my are are so immature!

By Dr. Robert Wallace

DR. WALLACE: I'm a girl who just turned 15, but I look like I'm 19! I'm already the tallest in my grade at school and I already have what looks like a woman's body. I'm about 5'8" tall and I weigh 130 pounds.

The problem is that older guys always talk to me and ask me out. These guys are usually between 18 and 20 years old, and once in a while a 17-year-old guy will get up his nerve to ask me out too.

But my parents don't let me date yet, and when they do, they have told me that I wouldn't be able to date any boys who are older than I am. Help! The boys I know who are 15 are babies when it comes to their maturity levels. Even the 16-year-old boys at my school are nothing special either.

What is a girl like me to do about this? I'll turn 16 in the spring and then I will likely be able to date, but my potential dating pool is going to be quite shallow and full of tadpoles. — Mature Teen Girl, via email

MATURE TEEN GIRL: Yes, physically you are larger and more advanced than many your age, but in terms of experience and mentality you are still developing, growing and learning about the world around you every day.

Take the time you have between now and your 16th birthday to observe what goes on around you. Seek to learn from the experiences, good and bad, of those around you. And I also recommend that you interact as much as possible with your classmates, even the boys who seem so young and out of touch. I'm sure one or two of them have good personalities and are fun to hang around with. Seek to be a leader in setting up some group activities with your classmates and over time you and they will all develop in many positive ways together.

By the time you reach dating age, you should have a few good candidates already lined up.


DR. WALLACE: I'm already worried about returning to my high school since there was an incident near the end of summer that has caused a lot of false rumors to be spread about me.

Let's just say that a friend and I crashed together one night in a local beach house, and the next morning everyone was saying that we were an item and had been physical together. Nothing could be further from the truth! We had simply been hanging out together watching late-night movies and doing a little partying. We both got tired and fell asleep, but nothing physical at all happened with anyone in our group.

What can I do when I return to my high school campus and the inevitable rumors start flying about me? — Not Looking Forward to The School Year, via email

NOT LOOKING FORWARD TO THE SCHOOL YEAR: I'd tell everyone who asks, and even those who don't, exactly what happened, just the way you told it to me. Of course, leave out the part about worrying about rumors; that will only unnecessarily add fuel to the rumor mill, as it could appear to some that you came up with a story to cover your tracks.

But in reality, you came up with no story at all. You simply explained what happened, and the good news is that there were witnesses to your truthful story, so suggest those who hound you to simply speak to the others as well.

Rumors usually have a relatively short shelf life when the underlying "story" is untrue. Stick to the truth, and don't take the bait and overreact to anyone at all. Be calm, casual and tell anyone who persists that they really need to "get a life" and stop recirculating nonsense about a situation they truly know nothing about.


* I understand and agree that registration on or use of this site constitutes agreement to its user agreement and privacy policy.

Related to this story

Most Popular

'SMILE' (Rated R for strong violence content, grisly images and violence)

Get up-to-the-minute news sent straight to your device.


News Alerts

Breaking News