Parting Shot: When I run for weed commissioner...

I’m not going to point out how my opponent has more weeds in his yard than I do. I’m not going to list the number of Weed Board meetings he has missed or talk about the big donations he’s getting from the Lorsban and Treflan folks.

I’m going to focus on the issues – where the campaign belongs – and show voters how committed and passionate I am.

When he comes with photographs of the “bad” years – when I turned off the hose and said to hell with my yard – I’m not going to acknowledge the attacks. (He knows, as well as my neighbors, that I was conserving water for those who needed it most. I wasn’t “lazy,” “unmotivated” or “negligent.” I was a compassionate, conservative guy who wanted to give back to others.)

When I go door-to-door to meet voters in the critical weed abatement program, I’m going to point out how he voted several times to eliminate them from participating – something I’d never do. I’m going to fill the county’s ditches with my oversized signs, hoping they, too, will be a method of reducing the nasty weeds we have to contend with.

I will make sure to go to the Woodbury County Fair and insist I get to judge the “roadside beauty” arrangement competition, knowing full well one man’s weeds could be another’s fall centerpiece.

I will listen to others’ attempts to pull me into the medical marijuana fray and politely point out that that isn’t the kind of “weed” I want to be associated with.

When we have the big Weed Commissioner debates, I will be armed with facts, not folksy stories designed to appeal to the least of us. I will detail my 10-point plan to improve weed control and direct listeners to my website that will feature a clever acronym for “weed.”

I will hand out environmentally friendly campaign buttons (not stickers that could easily be caught among the county’s weeds) and hang doortags that will also include a list of ways you, too, could solve the problem.

When I walk door-to-door to meet voters in my precious district, I will pull weeds wherever I see them and won’t expect thanks in return.

I will not accept donations from outside sources hoping to sway our weed futures. Instead, I will show how children can benefit from the work we’ve done during these, the “Weed Wars” years. And my television ads will illustrate how weeds have affected my family over the years, how I led the charge when others didn’t know what to do and how I greeted weed pullers when other commissioners were sitting in their lofty offices ignoring the growing problem around them.

I will welcome endorsements, but not solicit them. I won’t go, for example, to implement dealers or road construction crews seeking their support. I will hope my compassion, my commitment and my cantankerous personality will be enough to show that when I cast crucial weed abatement votes, I’ll be putting the people of my county first.

I will speak openly and frankly. I’ll make tough decisions. I’ll hug babies and salute veterans. I’ll listen to constituents. And when I don’t have a decent answer, I’ll say, “I’ll think about that and have my staff get back to you.”

I will go to Weed Commission dinners and eat the meals, even though I won’t know if they’re gluten-free.

I’ll fight to remove the weeds along Highway 20, even though it isn’t finished, and I’ll remind people I’m a passionate progressive with conservative values and lifelong weed experience.

I will run a clean campaign, pray for positive results and know, no matter how hard my opponent tries to bring me down, that I am the right man for the job.

I’m Bruce Miller and I approved this message.